Wednesday, August 10, 2016

Manview observations #4: We want to be seduced – not fixed!

It seems like only yesterday that we had our last Manview observation where Steve got all controversial and I felt like I had to slap him down a notch. :-p I'm glad the last Manview observation was so well received. Thank you, open-minded readers. I appreciate you not shooting my husband. I am rather fond of him.

Here's another on for you today. I hope you enjoy it. I had a chuckle reading it. Not being a guy, I can't say if anything is true or not, so I'll just have to take his Manview word on it.

It may be a fantasy of all women, weak and strong, to be able to turn a bad boy into the perfect partner and a lot of romance novels have been written on this fantasy. I am amazed how many women I have met who have an irreconcilable view on the ‘perfect’ man. He is tough, forceful, adventuresome, and most importantly, playful and naughty. But that is all supposed to change once he is in a committed relationship, right?  And to get there, the heroine in most of these romance novels is just the person to affect that change, right?  Well sorry ladies, but that is not going to happen. He is still going to be a man’s man and will likely cheat on you. These are bad boys who cannot change.

Bad boy tattoo and chains
Photo credit: AustinPony via Visual hunt / CC BY

And now let’s discuss the more sensitive types of male heroes (like Mr. Manview) who are just broken from having suffered PTSD after being a special forces hero, or the man suffering from a recent divorce or in a bad relationship (all the fault of the ex, right?), or the man who is otherwise perfect, but cannot resist the attractiveness of his co-worker who is smart, pretty, successful and athletic (probably even an ex-Olympic champion). These blokes are just asking to be fixed, right? WRONG! We (yes, that goes for Mr. Manview also) do not want to be fixed!  Hell, being fixed would mean there was something wrong with us in the first place and we know that is not the case. We have our fantasies also and they don’t start with us thinking we are broken. In fact, we want to turn the tables; we want to fix you! All the Sabrina types, the types who have not had a chance to succeed because of their situation until they met us and we decided we were the road to their salvation.  We want to be saviours, not saved. Most of us want to fix you, not be fixed by you!

Man holding baby
Photo credit: tomhe via VisualHunt / CC BY-NC-SA

What we want is to be seduced – but not obviously. Let us think we are the ones making the right moves. Let us think we have the upper hand, even though we don’t. Let us think we are smart, successful, athletic, even when we are not. When you seduce us, you get a better outcome.  You get someone who is so in love and hot for you that we insist on fixing ourselves. That is what men do – they fix themselves! That is how permanent change occurs and we become the love of your life.  Seduce us, don’t fix us and we are yours!  We just need to be shown the light and the light comes through seduction, not some program to fix us.

When I, as a man, read romance, seduce me; in fact, better yet, let me believe I am seducing you! That is the type of romance for which Mr. Manview yearns.

Couple sleeping
Photo credit: you mee via / CC BY

What do you think ladies? Do you think a man will fix himself for you?

Read all the other Manview observations here.

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  1. Interesting Manview. I'm with you on all the above, except in the writing world, I can't write about Mr. Nice Guy. He is boring writing material. Love changing the Bad Boy is a lovely theme in a romantic fantasy sort of way. It will be interesting to see if other women think this is a reality. Personally, Bad Boys do nothing for me but I enjoy writing them.

    1. I can't entirely agree with you on the nice guy front. I've read some awesome nice guys. Have you read Sofia Tate's Davison and Allegra series? Davison is a super nice guy and he's hot at hell. He's the kind of guy who will melt your underwear and that you want to bring home to meet your mama. I'm sure bad boys are fun to write, but I personally don't like reading them.