My poor brain. There's so much going on right now that I'm feeling quite overwhelmed. I don't post about any of it on Facebook, which I like to keep as my happy place, so only pictures of food, Steve, and all the gins and cocktails I drink. Yeah, we've a boozy bunch here!! I guess this bloggity is where I deal with and process all the big things going on in the world with a little bit of a romance spin to it because this is, after all, a romance blog.
Back to my poor brain. It's a bit overloaded right now. Last night I couldn't sleep (my fault, I drank caffeinated coffee) and ended up scrolling Facebook for hours. I should have read a book instead, but my brain wouldn't have any of that. I ended up reading loads of opinions and views on what's going on in America right now and also reading some utterly heartbreaking accounts of people being mistreated simply for the color of their skin. It's tragic. And it hurts my heart. So I didn't have a good night, but I realised one thing. It's okay to feel uncomfortable. It's okay to be disturbed and outraged. It is this discomfort and outrage that will bring about change, and already, what I've read and learned has made me look at things differently, and I will do what I can to support the people who have been affected and victimised.
On the reading front, my brain can't handle anything too heavy-duty right now. It hasn't been able to for a while now since the whole pandemic started, maybe even a little before then, but right now, My poor brain is using all its brain cells to process world events. With reading, I want some easier reads with less complicated plots, less drama, less angst, and much more likable characters.
I've been making my way through a post-apocalyptic series, and I've been enjoying it tremendously, but even with this series, I'm struggling right now, and I *know* I love the stories and I love the author's writing, along with her characters. It's not the book. It's me. At least, with this series, I know it's me.
It's taking a lot more effort to read and get through a book because my brain can't focus, and I'm getting distracted easily. I would read a few pages, then check social media or my emails or watch cooking videos. Then I'd go back and try to read again. I haven't been able to read in a concentrated fashion as I have been doing in the past where I'd sit down and happily lose myself in a book for hours. There are times when it's the book because I've read a few duds recently with some experimenting, but even with this one author I know I love, I'm struggling to concentrate, so I know it's not the book.
When I want easy reads (as opposed to deeper reads, not that I'm saying easy reads are not good), I look for fun tropes and sexy times. My go-to's are Madison Faye with her simple plots but over-the-top sexiness, BB Hamel with her daddy books (I love those!!) and anything featuring a mountain man although some of those can be quite deep too. Cassie Cole or Dizzy Hooper if I'm in the mood for a reverse harem book. Madison Faye has a new book coming out that I'm looking forward to, so I'll likely dive into it right away.
Right now, I'm torn between wanting an easy read and reading a book duet I won in a giveaway that I've been hanging out for. I know the books are fantastic, and I love the author and the previous book, which I mentioned in my omegaverse post. And you know what else? I'm so indecisive and scatter-brained that I can't seem to make a decision and just pick a book to read. I know I'm in the mood to reread a favorite romantic suspense author of mine, but her early books are getting re-edited. I'm waiting for those to get done before starting the series from the beginning and reading them all again. Steve is reading the series now, and he's loving the storytelling, so I'm reading a bit of it while cuddled into his shoulder as we lie in bed at night, and I'm getting sucked in all over again with the characters.
It's not from a lack of choice that I'm suffering from. I've got tons of books in my to-be-read (TBR) list, but since my concentration is shot and I can't seem to pick a book to save my life, I'm not reading as much. And with all the start-stop stalling while reading, I'm reading a lot slower too. This, of course, causes me a lot of anxiety since I'm used to blowing through a book a day and loving every minute of it.
But you know what I've been doing a lot? Watching YouTube videos. Mostly cooking videos and learning new recipes and cooking techniques. I've saved loads of recipes to cook, and I've learned a heap. I've even started cooking a lot of Asian food, which I haven't done much of before because this one person I watch makes beautiful videos, and she makes her recipes seem simple and doable. She's given me the confidence to try new things, and having the visual cues from the videos helps a great deal. I just watch the video a few times until I remember the steps and the techniques, then along with the written recipe attempt to replicate them in my kitchen. The results have been most satisfying, and my brain is quite happy coping with cooking videos. And Steve is happy eating the results. :-)
I'm hoping that I will be in a better frame of mind to read more in the near future, but if I can't, I'm determined to not force myself and be kind to myself. I'm going to try to not beat myself up about not reading as much or as fast and adjust my expectations of myself. It's that I feel a tremendous amount of pressure to read since I have so many books waiting for me with more and more being released each week that are calling my name. I know I will never read everything in my TBR before I die because I add more books to that list than I do reading them. A common bookworm problem.
Anyway, I wanted to vent a little and share my thoughts on where my head's at right now. Off with the fairies, it seems. How are you doing? Have you still been reading as usual, or have you been reading more or less?
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