Monday, March 21, 2016

Review: Samson's Lovely Mortal (Scanguards Vampires #1) by Tina Folsom

Book coverSamson's Lovely Mortal (Scanguards Vampires #1) by Tina Folsom
Purchase link: Amazon

My rating: star star star star

Heat rating: Flame  Flame  Flame

NEW YORK TIMES & USA TODAY Bestselling Author Tina Folsom presents: Samson's Lovely Mortal (Scanguards Vampires Series #1)

Vampire bachelor Samson can't get it up anymore. Not even his shrink can help him. That changes when the lovely mortal auditor Delilah tumbles into his arms after a seemingly random attack. Suddenly there's nothing wrong with his hydraulics - that is, as long as Delilah is the woman in his arms.

His scruples about taking Delilah to bed vanish when his shrink suggests it's the only way to cure his problem. Thinking all he needs is one night with her, Samson indulges in a night of pleasure and passion.

However, another attack on Delilah and a dead body later, and Samson has his hands full: not only with trying to hide the fact he's a vampire, but also with finding out what secrets Delilah harbors for somebody to want her harm.

"I'm addicted to Tina Folsom's books! The Scanguards series is one of the hottest things to happen to vampire romance. If you love scorching, fast-paced reads, don't miss this thrilling series!" --- Lara Adrian, New York Times Bestselling Author of the Midnight Breed series

This is the second time I am reading this book and it was so long ago that I originally read it, I don't remember any of it. This time, I'm listening to it via audiobook because later in the series, my favorite narrator, Eric Dove picks up narrating and I want to listen to him, so I need to catch up on the series. This book and the next five are narrated by Kevin Foley. It's always difficult breaking in a new narrator and getting used to his voice. Kevin is not bad and it took a little while to like him. I originally found him rather stilted and his voice seemed to hitch and pause at some rather odd instances, but after many hours and 75% of the book, I finally got used to him. I think I will be able to listen to him narrate the other books and enjoy them.

When I started listening to this story, I thought it was rather ridiculous and corny. Seriously, corny. I'm mean, c'mon, a vampire with erectile dysfunction? And only one human woman can cure him of not being able to get it up? I powered through the first few chapters and once I got past the corniness, the story started to suck me in.

Aside from the sex (where there was a lot of) the story and the danger surrounding Delilah had me curious as to what the bad guy was up to, why they were trying to kill her, and how Samson's company factored into it. I was intrigued enough by the mystery in the plot to keep going.

As for Samson as a vampire, well, we know right from the get go that he has a problem getting it up. Then Delilah comes along and hallelujah, his plumbing is working again!! It's funny if you really think about it. It tried not to but there are so many really satirical moments, almost like Ms Folsom is poking fun at the whole vampire genre, what with Samson being the way he is. There are glimpses when we see Samson as a true alpha male vampire, but those are few and far between. Most of the time, he's an emotional mess with anger management issues or a complete sap over Delilah. I kinda wish he'd man up.

Delilah, I was fairly blase about for the most part right up until she finds out Samson is a vampire. Then she flips out and digs her heels in and refuses to believe anything he says, refuses to acknowledge her own feelings, refuses to see reason, and basically refuses everything. She annoys the crap out of me at this point. I understand having the heroine take a little while to accept and believe what is going on, especially for something as fantastical as the fact that she's having a relationship with a vampire but this goes on beyond ridiculous. She remains adamant that she does not love Samson and keeps accusing him of lying to her. I do not feel Samson lied to her and I felt her accusations were ridiculous and unfounded. I have a hair trigger when it comes to deception and lying in stories I read, and none of what Samson did or said triggered my liar radar. I wanted to smack Delilah across the head with a two-by-four and tell her to wake up and smell the cappuccino. Her resistance to what Samson was, how he felt about her and how she felt about him went on for too long. A lot of her self-denial and reasons for not wanting a relationship with Samson also didn't make a lot of sense. It made me lose patience with the book.

Despite Delilah annoying the crap out of me towards the end of the book, it was still an enjoyable reading / listening experience overall. I gave this book 4 stars the first time I read it, I think the same rating remains even with the reading this time round.

View all my reviews

About the author

auTina Folsom is a New York Times and USA Today Bestselling Author. She's always been self-published and has found tremendous success with her paranormal series, Scanguards Vampires, Venice Vampyr, and Out of Olympus, selling more than 2 million copies of her 50 titles (which includes titles in German, French, and Spanish) in almost 4 years.

Tina writes about hot alpha heroes, bad boys, and kick-ass heroines. Fast-paced plots and steamy scenes are her specialty. She loves vampires and the concept of immortality, and now also writes contemporary romance and has launched the Eternal Bachelors Club series.

Tina is a one-women-enterprise. She writes constantly and translates her own books into German, her native language. Her books are available in e-book format, as paperbacks, as audio books, and in foreign languages.

Tina Folsom was born in Germany and has been living in English speaking countries for over 25 years, the last 13 of them in San Francisco, where she's married to an American. Tina has always been a bit of a globe trotter: after living in Lausanne, Switzerland, she briefly worked on a cruise ship in the Mediterranean, then lived a year in Munich, before moving to London. There, she became an accountant. But after 8 years she decided to move overseas.

In New York she studied drama at the American Academy of Dramatic Arts then moved to Los Angeles a year later to pursue studies in screenwriting. In 2008 she wrote her first romance. She now has 18 novels in English and dozens in other languages.

Author links: Website - Facebook - Twitter - Goodreads - Email - Newsletter

Find Deanna around SOCIAL MEDIA:
blogger  blogger  rss  facebook  twitter  instagram  email  youtube  pinterest  google+  goodreads


  1. LOL I loved the erectile dysfunction when I read this one years ago. Was so funny and yes there was some corny in there for sure. lol Hope you enjoy the rest of the listens!

    1. I tried the second book but I was not a fan of it. I absolutely HATED the heroine. Not sure if I'm going back to the series or not yet. Still a bit on the fence about it.